Evening Mist
by r2roswell
Summary: Once again Edward Cullen must leave but this time not by choice. Despite his absence, Bella must deal with other issues that arise. Will she keep it all together or will she fall apart?
1. 1 Another End

**Another End**

I saw him standing near my window. The sky had grown dark and the only light that shinned came from the full moon. I could tell something was wrong. He was cold, distant as he had been the first time he told me of the terrible news that he would be leaving as his way of protecting me but this time I was ready for it, I knew what was coming. As much as I wanted this to be a dream and not have him leave, I knew this time was different because unlike last time there was no choice to be made, it simply was.

I crept to the edge of my bed with my feet underneath me. "Do you really have to go," I whispered to him knowing full well he could hear me.

He turned and looked in my direction and a sad smile crossed his face. "I have to go; I don't have a choice Bella."

"Of course you do."

"No love, I don't, not this time. As much as I want to stay you know I can't."

"This isn't fair," I said slumping a little. Edward walked towards me and sat down, placing me on top of him.

"I know," he said. "You know I love you, right."

I perked up some, "Then take me with you."

"Now that's not fair. I can't Bella. As much as I love you I can't bring you with me, I can't put you at risk."

"What's more dangerous- I've handled the Volturi, werewolves gone awry, and even young immature vampires. You'd think you'd learn by now that I'm capable of taking care of myself."

Edward laughed, "Not without help you can't."

I looked down and then at him, "By when do you have to leave?"

"Before sunrise," he replied.

"Good so that gives us four hours."

Edward looked up at me curiously as if trying to read me but knowing he couldn't, "What's in that head of yours Bella Swan?"

I got up from Edward's lap and stood in front of him. Gently I started to take off my top shirt revealing to him the bra underneath. I was never the type of girl to throw myself at a guy but given that this was Edward's last night, I had to try. He instantly gave me the reaction I knew was coming but that didn't stop me. I started removing my pajama pants as well; standing in front of him in nothing but my underclothes and not even feeling ashamed or embarrassed despite not having a clue as to what I was doing; I was simply going through the motions and feelings that rang deep within me. Edward still looked away though I know he noticed.

"We can't do this Bella," he said.

"Why not," I asked knowing what his answer would be.

"You know why, we can't be together without me hurting you. I could never bring myself to hurt you that way."

"Edward, nothing can be as painful as when you left me the first time. I can handle this."

"What about Charlie?"

"He's a heavy sleeper," Edward still didn't look convinced, "Please Edward? You're leaving for who knows how long. I don't want to waste another minute by not being with you."

"Is this really what you want?"

I nodded.

"And the risks don't scare you?"

"Not when I'm with you," I replied.

Edward looked at me and I could see that he was examining every inch of my being.

"How did I get so lucky," he asked in soft and near poetic tone.

"I'm still trying to figure that out myself."

It was then that Edward stood up. He caressed my face with his finger down to my lips which I gently kissed even though I knew I couldn't hurt him if I tried.

"You know if I didn't love you so much," he said to me, "I would never agree to this. If I hurt you though don't hold back, let me know."

"I promise. I love you two Edward."

The two of us made our way to the bed. Though I couldn't have my other wish come true of becoming like him at least I could have a part of him that belonged to me and no one else. And likewise with him; Edward would have a part of me that I would never in my life share with others. This was it for me and I was content with that. From the moment I had met Edward Cullen I had fallen so deep that I was suddenly irrevocably in love with him. Nothing else mattered except this moment: the touch of his cold skin against mine, the touch of his lips as he caressed my body, the sensation of my lips against his skin. Nothing could have been more perfect than this night. And then just as quickly as the moment had come it was gone in an instant.

~*~*~*~

I cannot remember what time I fell asleep only that I did much later after we had finished. I was restless on my bed; the comfort of Edward no longer there as he always was when I fell asleep. Being human sometimes had its disadvantages.

I looked over and when I was finally fully alert did I become aware of the destruction. My pillows had been smashed in- the cotton spread all over the place, my headboard had several cracks and the bed beneath me, I realized, had sunk in, my knees having reached the floor if I rolled over. How would I explain this to Charlie? I had several bruises on my arm but nothing major, I could easily handle it. I had to. The forecast called for more rain today so I could easily cover them with one of my long sleeved shirts.

I got up from my bed and went to the window- an involuntary reaction now since Edward used to be there waiting for me; standing near his car outside, waiting as always. I couldn't help but smile at the memories though they pained me.

I got dressed and made my way to school as usual; half expecting to see Edward's car or any of the other Cullen's there in the parking lot. The day had gone slowly much like it had the first time he left but rather than ignoring my friends, I sat with them.

"So where's Cullen," Mike had asked.

"Yeah," replied Jessica, "For the most part you two are inseparable.

"He's out of town," I said. What else could I tell them, that Edward and his family had gone off in search of some of Edward's biological family that he stumbled upon in which Edward had a strong feeling that they were somehow immortal too? No that wouldn't fly well at all.

"Why don't you just go with him," Mike asked.

Why did he have to say that? Of course I wanted to go with him, I would have given anything to be with Edward even if it meant risking my own human life but after my many close calls, Edward wouldn't have any of it.

"Charlie's the chief of police remember," I said to my group of friends, "I don't think it would look good if his daughter went out of town with the boyfriend he doesn't approve of."

"I guess you're right," Jessica said with her demeaning tone as always.

In a part I was right. Many "official" stories had been circulated about me and Edward. And having a father who was the chief of police certainly didn't help much. We just let people go on believing the stories while the truths were out own secrets.

I was too lost in those memories to realize that my friends were trying to get my attention. It took a thrown piece of food at me to wake me from my reverie.

"So what do you say, Bella," Eric said to me, "You in?"

"In for what," I asked needing him to repeat the question.

"La Push beach, we're all headed down Saturday."

La Push. Great. Surrounded by werewolves and not to mention Jacob Black. Given the tension there was, he was the last person I wanted to see and surely I would run into him at La Push.

"I can't this weekend," I lied which was all too common when it came to my friends. "I'm actually going hiking."

"You can't do that another time," Mike always asked the same question whenever I had to bail.

"Sorry, I had all ready set it for this weekend," I said shrugging a little.

"Well," said Angela, "Do you want us to tell Jacob 'hi' for you? We're bound to see him."

I looked down at my untouched food wishing she hadn't brought him up.

"No," I replied. "That's cool. Just- just don't tell him anything."

The rest of the day flew in a foggy haze. I somehow made my way home and up to my room. I put my school pack on the broken bed, then made my way to the closet and pulled out my duffle bag. I smiled at its significance: Edward had surprised me with it one afternoon.

"In case you have to leave home again," he said to me with a coy smile.

Packed inside were some hygiene products, a couple of books, some survival gear, and clothes that I would actually wear. It amazed me that he was somehow able to get past Alice on that.

I made my way downstairs leaving a not for Charlie on the fridge:

Gone hiking. Don't send the search parties. –Bella

Though I didn't give specifics as to exactly where I was going I figured it was better than nothing at all like I had done so many times before.

I made my way to the truck making sure the rest of my gear was there. Edward had made sure to leave some camping supplies and extra jackets underneath a tarp. I was good to go.


	2. 2 Missing Edward

**2. Missing Edward**

I drove well into the night; eventually pulling up to the road that had become an all too familiar route. The road continued to wind until I soon stopped the truck. I took my duffle and a blanket from under the tarp. The house stood perfectly; completely undisturbed, lifeless. Making my way up the front steps, I reached for the key that dangled alongside my own truck and house keys. I didn't bother turning on any lights since the house had truly become a second home. Nothing had changed- the furniture remained in place, hoping its residents soon would return.

I found myself drifting to his room. Placing my duffle on the floor, I walked to his leather white couch, covered myself with the blanket and lay down. His scene was just as strong here and I embraced it. The first time he left he wanted me to not remember. He made no such claim this time.

Though I missed him, my dreams were quite pleasant for a change: my life had suddenly stopped almost as if I were frozen in time. Edward stood beside me- his skin sparkling as bright as ever. I looked down at mine. No shimmer. Was I somehow defective? I frowned but Edward took my hand and his smile was tenfold. I didn't understand. More so, what I could not understand was that my arms literally felt heavy. Though I couldn't feel the pain, I knew something was there. In what seemed like minutes I woke up to the brightness in the room. I sat up seeing Edward smiling. Just like in the dream, his skin shimmered in the sunlight. I placed one hand to my heart. No heartbeat. I didn't understand. Was this another dream? My heart wasn't beating and yet my skin didn't shimmer the way a normal vampires did. None of this made any sense. I suddenly became aware of the heaviness from my arms. They cradled my stomach and I finally realized what was happening.


	3. Week 1

**WEEK 1**


	4. Week 2

**WEEK 2**


	5. Week 3

**WEEK 3**


	6. Week 4

**WEEK 4**


	7. Week 5

**WEEK 5**


	8. Week 6

**WEEK 6**

**(December)**


	9. 3 Changes

**3. Changes**

I sat at the dinner table with Charlie playing around with my untouched lasagna.

"I was hoping we wouldn't have to go through this again, Bella," Charlie said to me slamming his fork onto his plate.

I looked up at him, "Go through what?"

"Your behavior. Ever since Edward left, you've been spending endless nights at the Cullen's empty house."

"Have you been following me?" I asked feeling betrayed. He continued however.

"You've shut off from me, your mother, your friends, and not to mention Jacob Black. What did he ever do to you to deserve such treatment?"

He fell in love with me. I knew better than to say that to Charlie. He was always more of a fan of Jacob than of Edward. "It's complicated," I said to him.

"It shouldn't be or have you not noticed how in love he is with you?"

I looked up at Charlie; a little startled.

"Jacob told me," he said answering my unasked question. "Poor kid, boy doesn't know how to keep a secret. My point is Bells, maybe you should forget about Edward Cullen. Maybe Jacob is the right guy for you."

I had had enough of this. I stood up but not without consequence. A wave of dizziness washed over me and I held onto the chair for support. This didn't go unnoticed by Charlie. He quickly placed his hand on my arm which felt warm to the touch.

"I'm fine," I said to him. He didn't press the issue. "Don't; don't tell me to forget Edward because I won't. I love him and Jake is just going to have to deal with that."

"And what if he doesn't come back, Bella?"

Then I have a thousand lifetimes to wait for him, I was sure of that much. My heart had stopped beating; my skin was ice cold even my speed capabilities were like Edward's, if not faster. The only difference was that I did not glimmer in the sunlight the way he did.

I looked at Charlie and then made my way upstairs to my room, slamming the door behind me. I sat on the front edge of the broken bed and looked out the window. The sky was dark- no doubt the result of another new moon. I was hoping for some kind of sign to show me he was there waiting in the darkness. There was nothing instead just the knocking outside my door. It seemed for once Charlie had decided not to give up.

"Bella come on, we need to talk about this," he said from the outside.

I wasn't really in the mood to talk but I knew he was right. We had a lot to talk about, none of it easy but it was bound to come out eventually. Instinctively I placed my hand on my stomach and took a deep breath. I then placed my hands on the edge of my bed.

"It's open," I said to him so Charlie made his way into the room.

~*~*~*~

Charlie let his eyes drift from me to my abdomen and back to me. The look in his face said it all. Complete disappointment.

"Bella, how could this…are you sure?"

Though I hadn't taken a pregnancy test or scene a doctor, I was positive.

"Yeah, I'm sure."

"How…far along…" Charlie asked struggling to get the words out.

Today was Friday evening.

"Six weeks and a day," I said exactly.

Charlie shook his head. I did feel bad for him considering how bad it looked: the daughter of the Chief of police had gone off and gotten herself knocked up and the father was nowhere to be found. I knew Edward though- he wasn't one to abandon responsibility or his family. The work he was doing right now was important to him because it was his very family that he was trying to protect, me included.

"Okay," Charlie said. "Um, first things first, we need to get you started on prenatal vitamins and get you to a doctor."

"No," I immediately said standing up and making my way to the window. "No doctor."

"Bella, you have to see a doctor, they need to make sure you and the…" Charlie gulped at the next part, "baby are okay."

Yeah I thought and when the doctor realizes that the baby isn't fully human we're going to be sent away and dissected for study. I was all ready putting Charlie at risk by telling him about the pregnancy- he couldn't find out more.

"We'll be okay," I said still not looking at him. I closed my eyes and took a deep breath pretending to inhale; a vampire trick I had come to learn on my own. "I just… we just need Carlisle and everything will be okay. Carlisle will know what to do."

"Bella, all of the Cullen's are gone, I don't think Dr. Cullen is coming back. And quite frankly I don't understand how he could know of your condition."

I let out a small smile. If anyone knew the Cullen's did thanks to Alice. I wasn't around any werewolves lately so she had to have a clear view as to what was going on.

"He has to," I said trying my best to believe in my own lie. What else could I do? What else could I believe? Everything was changing so fast. I was no longer human which made no sense since I hadn't even been bitten, though I did have a theory, my baby was most likely part human-part vampire. I was alone in this knowledge as far as present company was concerned. Somehow I had to keep believing that Alice had seen this and had told Carlisle about it. I couldn't go through this alone could I? What did I know about raising a baby, let alone a non-human one? I didn't know if I had the nine month situation like most normal pregnancies.

"And if he doesn't," Charlie asked taking me away from my thoughts. I hadn't even allowed myself to consider that possibility.

Then it hit me: Tanya's family. They were like a second family to the Cullen's. Surely if they knew I was now one of them and carrying Edward's child they would be able to help.

"Carlisle has family. I'm sure they could help."

I could sense Charlie shake his head. "I don't know Bells, if you won't see a doctor then maybe the best thing to do would be to not have the baby."

No I thought to myself! There was no way. I could never even consider such a choice. The moment I had know the dream to be true, I had all ready fallen in love with this baby.

I shook my head, "I can't do that."

"Bella, seriously think about this. You're eighteen. Are you seriously ready to put your life on hold and devote it to another? And what about school? You don't want to be a fifty year old beginning her freshman year of college." I smiled at the notion, knowing it would never come to that. I had plenty of time for school.

The answer was simple. "Yes," I said to him. I looked over at Charlie. "This is Edward's baby. And odds are it will be the only child we ever have."

I couldn't explain to him why that was. He just had to trust me on this.

"I've all ready given up Edward," I said to Charlie. "Don't ask me to give up the baby too. It's all I have left of him."

Charlie looked defeated. "Well then, I guess we're going to need a bigger house." I smiled at him. "Just do me one favor: Call your mother."

My face suddenly went pale. "I'm not ready for her to know. Not just yet."

"She's gonna find out Bells."

"Maybe but when she does it'll be on my terms."


	10. 3 Deleted Scene

**Ch. 3: Deleted Scene**

This was the first time Charlie truly took notice of my broken bed. I had replaced the pillows but the headboard still had the cracks and the bed still remained on the floor.

"I could easily fix this for you," he said.

"I prefer it this way," I said half telling the truth. While I wouldn't have minded having my bed back to the way it was at the same time I couldn't bring myself to do it only because it had been the last place Edward and I had been together. Having the bed fixed would somehow take the memories away. Of course I had something else in which to always remember the night but still; the bed itself held some kind of significance; a value that I didn't want tarnished.

"Now Bells, I know we don't talk about this stuff much…about boys," he said struggling as usual with that subject, "If you won't talk to your friends or to the school counselor or to a therapist or to your mother, then talk to me."

It was then that I just completely lost it. Normally I had been able to keep control, even divert the subject if necessary but not this time.

"I miss him dad, a lot." Rather than cut in he let me continue. "I know he's left before but this time is just different. I really need him right now. I don't think I can do this without him."

Charlie then did something completely unexpected: he placed his arm around my shoulder. "You can't do what Bella?"

I looked down to where my left hand cradled the forming bump on my stomach and Charlie suddenly knew.


	11. 4 Home

**4. Home**

It didn't take Charlie and I long to find a new place to live. We had a good five weeks thanks to my time off for Christmas break. This house had a larger dining room and kitchen, three bathrooms: one downstairs and two upstairs, and three bedrooms all upstairs. Charlie insisted that I take the master bedroom since a door connected it to the next room over which would be used for the nursery.

As of yet I still had not talked to my friends even to wish them a Merry Christmas which was coming up this week. Too much was happening that I couldn't bring myself to deal just yet especially since Lisle, as I came to refer to the baby, had grown a little more each week. This week would mark nine weeks and aside from the abnormal growth, everything seemed to be normal.

Each weekend I continued to spend my time at the Cullens; sometimes even up to five days a week much to Charlie's disapproval. He could not understand my reasoning for being there so much. He could not understand a lot of things. And I could not explain them to him. Like most things he just had to trust me.

Charlie came into my room with buckets of pain in hand.

"So what are we going with?" he asked.

"For what?"

"For my grandchild's room," he replied.

As the weeks went on, Charlie had become just as thrilled about the baby as I had much to my surprise and amusement.

I looked at the buckets of paint: a light pink, green and blue.

"Definitely the greens and blues."

"Are you sure? I can still take you to the doctor…"

Before he could finish, I cut him off, "I'm sure. The only doctor I need is Carlisle."

Charlie huffed. He didn't like my sense of false hope.

There was a knock at the front door. Grateful for the distraction I went to answer it while Charlie went about his way to paint Lisle's room. He didn't want me anywhere near the fumes. I played along even though I couldn't smell anything except for his human scent which wasn't all that appetizing.

When I knew Charlie wasn't looking I used my vampire speed and raced downstairs. Humanly I opened the door surprised to see Billy and Jacob Black. I had not seen them in over a month.

"Afternoon Bella," said Billy.

"Hi Mr. Black."

I moved out of the way so they could enter. Jake simply nodded at me as he made his way in.

"I thought I heard someone roll in," Charlie said from the top of the stairs, making his way down.

"Afternoon Charlie," Billy said, "Brought a little house warming gift," he said referring to the bag which no doubt carried a pack of R&R and fish fry.

I began to make my way to the kitchen for my truck keys when I heard Charlie excuse himself and follow me."

"Not tonight you're not," he said to me. "We have company Bells, be polite."

"I was just going out for a drink."

"We've got plenty of juices, water, and cokes."

Yeah but not blood: the Cullens' kept an emergency stock of animal blood which had become useful until I could learn to hunt on my own.

"I'm really craving something else right now dad."

"Well then tell me what it is and I'll go out and get it for you."

I looked at him. "On second thought it can wait."

"Fine but don't go running off while the Black's are here visiting."

"I won't I'll just be upstairs."

"Why not just stay and visit, you hardly talk to your friends anymore."

"Maybe later, I don't feel like I'd be great company right now."

"Suit yourself."

Charlie went back to his guests. I sighed and made my way upstairs grateful that our new home had two stairwells so I wouldn't have to go through the main one in the hall. I was about to lie on the bed when that awful smell hit again. I knew what it was: Jake. He came into the room.

"You know," he said, "Just when I think things are going back to normal, they don't. Where are they Bella?"

"Where are what?"

"You know what: the leeches, the blood suckers."

"They haven't been around."

"Now I know that's not true. You smell of them."

I had almost forgotten Jacob could smell vampires much like I could smell him. Almost.

I took a false human breath and sat on the edge of the bed. There was no way I could lie to him now. I owed him that much.

"Jake I have something to tell you: I'm not human anymore."

I could see his fury start to form but I stopped him before it could go any further.

"Don't worry," I said to him, "The treaty isn't broken. I didn't get bit or anything."

"Then how?"

"I'm not exactly sure but I think it's because of the…pregnancy."

Jake's jaw dropped, "You're…pregnant?"

I nodded.

"And is it…his?" Again I nodded. "Guess you're off the market then hu."

I looked at Jake and couldn't help but smile. "I've never been on the market Jacob. My heart has always belonged to Edward, you know that."

"I know. A guy can't help but dream though right."

Jacob made his way towards me and sat down. "Well," he said, "If it's okay I'm not going anywhere."

"Jake I don't expect you to be around for me."

He looked down to the floor. "Kind of too late for that Bella."

I looked at him understanding what he meant. "You didn't," I said.

"We can't choose who we imprint Bella. If I can't…be with you then the best I can do is be like a brother. I'm sorry."

"Jake there has to be someone else for you out there."

"It doesn't matter." He shook his head, "Just my luck, the person I happen to imprint turns out to be a vampire."

"Hey I don't have it easy either," I said to him, "My best friend is a werewolf. Do you have any idea how bad you smell?"

Jake and I both laughed.

~*~*~*~

Jacob and I continued to talk for a while when Charlie came in. He had a smile on his face like he had been surprised by something.

"Bells, there's some people here to see you."

Jacob and I looked at each other and then followed Charlie. The two visitors stood motionless. Though no longer human, the joy I felt was just as heartfelt as it had been the first time around.

"Oh Alice, Carlisle," I cried rushing to hug them both at the same time. No longer did either of them feel as hard now that I was the same as them.

"Woah, easy there Bella," Alice said to me, "Don't want to hurt the little one."

Knowing Charlie was still in the room I asked, "You know?"

Alice and Carlisle looked at Charlie and she replied, "Lucky guess. You and my brother never could keep your hands off each other." This made Jacob squirm a bit. "Speaking of which, I brought you something." Alice pulled out a large thermos. When Jacob took a whiff of the smell he covered his nose.

"Is that…"

Alice looked at him. "Dark Cherry Soda with a twist," she said handing it to me.

Charlie looked at me, "Well Bells if that's what you wanted you could've told me."

After taking another sip I said to him, "Sorry but nothing can compare to the way the Cullen's make it," which wasn't entirely a lie. Somehow as a vampire I had not been able to acquire the thirst for human blood but rather take on the vegetarian lifestyle that the Cullen's had assimilated to.

Billy Black looked at all of us clearly displeased. "Jacob," he said. "It's getting late son and I'm sure Bella and the Cullen's have a lot of catching up to do."

Right," Jake replied. "I'll see you tomorrow Bella."

Alice was about to place her hand on his before thinking better of it. She couldn't stand his smell either.

"Not so fast Fido, Bella is mine tomorrow." She looked at me, "We need a girl's day out: Shopping for us as well as my nephew."

I rolled my eyes, "Alice you don't plan to spoil him do you?"

She smiled one of her wide grins, "Now what kind of aunt would I be if I didn't?"

Leave it to Alice to always make a bigger deal of things.

Jacob looked at me, "Bella I'll call you to see when we can do something okay?"

"Sounds good," I replied.

Jake then suddenly placed his large warm fingers and wiggled them on my stomach. "Later little guy, take care of your mom for me okay," he said.

I could see how uncomfortable this baby talk was making Charlie and Billy. Not that I blamed them. It was a little uncomfortable for me as well. Jake smiled at me and then wheeled out his father. Carlisle walked out with them and Charlie leaving Alice and I behind. It didn't take the two of them long to come back in.

Charlie somehow looked defeated when he said to me, "I'm not fond of the idea but I agreed with Dr. Cullen here that you can spend a few days at their place. Dr. Cullen says he has the medical equipment needed to monitor you and the baby. Just be sure you're back on Sunday.

Sunday. December 25th. With all that was going on, Christmas had suddenly seemed like a blur compared to everything else. Mom and Phil were flying in from Jacksonville on Saturday.

As if sensing my worry Alice suddenly said, "Don't worry sis, I've got it all covered.

"Thanks Alice."

"Well," said Carlisle, "We should get going. I think Bella has wasted enough time putting off seeing a doctor."

Charlie looked at me with disapproval.

"Don't worry Charlie," Alice said reassuringly. "We'll take good care of her and the baby. Bella is family to us."

He shook his head, "Seems all I do lately is go on blind faith. Faith I never had to begin with."

I kissed Charlie on the cheek. He had become used to my cold touch so he didn't shudder. "We'll be fine dad, I promise. I'll see you on Sunday."

Charlie nodded. I got my over night pack from the closet to play along the human charade and then followed Alice and Carlisle out to their car.


	12. 5 Family

**5. Family**

Spending the next few days with Carlisle and Alice was like a dream come true. Carlisle had asked about my condition and was quite curious as to why I became a vampire when I hadn't been bitten. An anomaly he called it. He wasn't quite knowledgeable when it came to hybrid pregnancies but the gestation seemed to be fluctuating so it was difficult to determine its length. For precautionary sakes he planned for six to eight months should it fall somewhere in between. As far as he could tell, despite the anomalies, everything seemed to be normal.

Alice and I were able to manage a couple of days to ourselves. We went to Seattle and Port Angeles. She was adamant about shopping for baby supplies even as much as diapers to keep up with the human façade that it would need such human moments.

It was Saturday afternoon, Christmas eve. My mom and Phil had arrived in town but given both of my current situations I wasn't quite ready to see them. Though he hated lying to Renee, Charlie called to tell her I wasn't feeling well but that I would be okay by tomorrow.

Alice and I both sat on the couch in the living room. The TV was on but neither of us was paying much attention to it.

"So have you heard from Edward," I asked her no longer having the strength to avoid the subject anymore.

She nodded, "About two weeks ago, said he was chasing down a lead in the South Pole."

I nodded. I knew how important this mission was to him but at the same time I wished he would just come home, if not for me then for the sake of his son.

"You know he wouldn't have left if he hadn't had a choice."

"I know it's just hard without him. He should be here for this," I said placing my hand on my stomach.

Alice placed her hand on top of mine, "He's going to be so surprised."

"You haven't told him yet?"

"It's hard since he's constantly on the move. He never stays around long enough to have a descent conversation. So," Alice said perking up and changing the subject. "I'm thinking we'll head to your house early tomorrow to help your dad set up. He's got all those boring single colored white Christmas lights."

"I don't know Alice," I said shaking my head, "We're not big on holidays."

"That's because you and Charlie are too much alike. It's the best time of the year, it's gotta be fun. Not dragging and dreadful like those things they show on TV. Come on it'll be fun. What's the point in having a houseful of guests if there's no life in it? Please Bella, I promise it'll be great and if it's not then I'll let you buy me one of those boring tomboy outfits you enjoy so much. Please?"

I smiled at Alice. She always had a way of getting her own way when it came to celebrations that it was so hard to say no.

"Alright, fine."

She wrapped her arms around me. "Thank you Bella, thank you." She let go of me, "We'll start at five a.m."

"That early?"

"What do you plan to sleep in," she joked.

"No but I'm pretty sure Charlie does."

"He won't mind. Besides given how un-festive your house is, we need all the time we can savor to get it just right."

~*~*~*~

By ten a.m. Charlie had woken up. He came downstairs to find his living room transformed into a miniature Santa's village. A huge tree with colored lights lit up the room. Along the fireplace were rows of stockings for my family, the Cullens, and the Blacks.

I heard Charlie behind me but didn't turn around. Instead I focused on the ornaments I was hanging.

"Bella, what in the world," he said to me. I turned to face him. "Merry Christmas, dad," I said to him.

"This looks," he couldn't even find the right words to say.

"A little much, not my idea," I said in my defense.

"Then whose idea was it?"

I took his hand. Again he didn't mind the coolness of it. Like the many changes that had occurred to me this was one he had accepted without asking questions.

"Come with me," I said pulling him to the front of the house. He took a look and was stunned.

"Is this really," Charlie began but was stopped by an angelic voice from the roof.

"Morning Charlie," Alice said to him.

"Alice Cullen," he asked.

She smiled, "The one and only. So what do you think?"

"It's very…festive."

"Excellent, that's exactly what I was going for."

"Alice I appreciate you doing this but Bella and I…"

"Aren't much for celebrations," she said finishing for him. "I know." She then looked at me. "Now where have I heard that before?"

I looked at Charlie, "Whatever you do don't try to talk her out of it. The more you do the more insistent she becomes."

"Will I have to remember that," he asked Alice. She simply nodded with a smile.

~*~*~*~

The rest of the day went fairly smoothly. By the evening everyone had arrived. Luckily my mother and Phil never commented on my appearance which was a first for her since she always gashed on these sort of things. Jacob was at my beckon call which frustrated Alice some. I had to explain the reason. Naturally she was disgusted and horrified with the notion that a werewolf could imprint a vampire. In the history and legends that had never been done before. I had come to accept that with me even the unexplainable could not be explained.

The doorbell rang and I went to answer it grateful for the distraction. The surprises it seemed, just kept on coming. Carlisle stood there with Esme, Jasper, Rosalie and Emmett.

"Merry Christmas," Esme said to me pulling me in for a tight hug. I replied the same to her and ushered my family inside.

"Dog boy is here isn't he," Rosalie commented. I just nodded. "Figures could smell him a mile down the road."

"That's enough Rosalie," Esme said.

"The Blacks are old friends of Charlie's," said Carlisle, "Let's try to keep things civil."

"So sis," Emmett said to me, "Got any good food?"

I looked at him thinking I miss understood, "You don't eat," I replied.

"So, neither do you," he said back, "Doesn't mean I can't play along."

"Kitchen," I said pointing in the direction.

"Excellent."

Carlisle, Esme, and Jasper followed me into the living room while Rosalie followed Emmett. Within seconds Jasper was by Alice's side. Though I could no longer feel it, I wanted to be jealous only because of the longing I had for Edward.

"Dad," I said to him, "Look who showed up."

Charlie got up from his seat and walked over to us, "Dr. Cullen good to see you again."

"Carlisle please, I think we're family enough to drop the formalities."

Charlie nodded, "Alright."

"I don't think you've met my wife, Esme."

"Not officially no: pleasure to meet you Mrs. Cullen."

"You too Charlie," she said.

I watched my two families take a liking to each other and as they did so I took the time to slip out the back door. I loved them all but right now I just wanted some time to myself feeling a little heartbroken that the main part of my family was no where around. I began to walk through the all too familiar woods. Now thanks to my vampire vision I no longer had the need for a flashlight to guide my way. My vision was as perfect as it would be in the daylight.

I stopped in the middle of the woods- the place where only a year ago I had admitted out loud that Edward Cullen was a vampire. Had it really been just a year? It seemed that ever since I had moved to Forks my life had moved at such a rapid speed. I had been attacked by a tracker, I had flown to Italy to save Edward from committing suicide, and I had helped with a battle of young vampires sent by Victoria to kill me. And to top things off, my family had become a mixture of humans, vampires, and werewolves. I was living the American dream alright or some might say an American nightmare.

I closed my eyes and let the forest envelop me. My head felt like it was spinning but I knew I would not fall. As I opened my eyes, there he stood: coming through the evening mist. He reached me, cupped my face and gently kissed my lips. I closed my eyes melting into him not wanting to wake up, knowing if I did he would surely be gone. When our lips parted I looked up at him.

"Are you really here," I asked.

"For now," was his only reply.

"I don't want this to end."

"It can never end with us Bella. I think you know that by now. Nothing can ever tear us apart no matter how far the distance."

"Did you find what you were looking for?"

Edward turned away and faced the empty trees.

"They're savages Bella. I don't want you anywhere near them. Not until they can control themselves."

"Then stay here," I pleaded. "Be with your family, with me, our family."

Edward turned at my last two words, "Our family," he repeated, "Are you…" He focused his eyes and could see the lump on my abdomen. His features turned ghostly pale but then quickly faded into a solemn smile. "I can't stay here Bella. They need me."

"We need you," I again pleaded.

"Love, you know I have to do this. I always believed my father died in the world. I never knew others had saved him. He and my brothers are…killers now. It doesn't have to be that way for them. I can show them our ways. They're good people Bella they just need someone to guide them on the right path."

"But why does it have to be you?"

"Because," he said to me, "I'm still the son of Edward Masen."

"You're Carlisle and Esme's son too."

Edward shook his head. "I don't want to argue with you on this. They're family and you know us Cullen's, we go out to any length to save our family."

I nodded fully agreeing with him.

"I came back," he said, "to see you but to also ask you an important question. I don't know how long it will take for me to train Edward and my three brothers. I know it's not fair of me to ask; world knows you deserve so much more than me."

I took his hand, "Don't ever say that. Don't ever think it. I love you and I would wait a thousand lifetimes for you if I had to."

He smiled his huge grin, "I was hoping you'd say that."

I hit him playfully in the chest, "Just because I said that doesn't mean I will. Having you gone is unbearable."

"You're strong though and this time you're not completely alone. My family isn't going anywhere this time."

"I wish I could go with you."

"Some other time," he told me, "when it's safe."

"I'm not completely helpless you know."

"I know but think of our son. He's part human too. It would be dangerous for him." He had a point. "Since you've agreed to wait for me, will you do me the honor of something else?" I nodded knowing exactly what was coming. Sure enough he pulled a ring from his pocket and placed it on my ring finger. "Marry me when I return."

My answer to him was simple, "I promise."

~*~*~*~

I walked slowly back to the house, not really in the mood to be surrounded by anyone but Edward was right, if I didn't have him then at least I had his family, my family.

I walked in careful not to make any noise but that didn't help much.

"Bella," Charlie called from the living room. "Is that you?"

I walked in the living room.

"Yeah dad it's me."

"Where were you?"

"I just went for a walk. That's okay right?"

Charlie nodded, "Sure but I just wish you would've let someone know. I hate you walking alone in the woods like that."

"Won't happen again Chief Swan," Jacob said speaking up, "I won't let it."

I shook my head, "That's not necessary Jake but thanks besides I'm fine, nothing happened."

Alice looked up at me knowing that wasn't entirely true. Her face lit up. "Something happened," she said. I looked at her not wanting her to say anything but it was too late. "I knew it, he proposed didn't he?"

Alice was at my side in an instant and held up my ring finger. I had forgotten it was there. It had only been a few minutes but all ready it began to feel as if it were a part of me.

Renee came up to me. "Isabella, you're engaged, congratulations!" she said hugging me. "Where's my future son in law?" She asked after releasing her hold on me.

"He um couldn't stay. He had another family obligation that was high priority," I said more to Carlisle and Esme who nodded in understanding.

In the corner I could see Charlie's semi-happy holiday gestures go to something cold. A look I was familiar with when it came to talking about Edward Cullen.

"I don't know about this Bella," he said finally speaking up. "It just seems a little rushed. I mean you haven't even graduated high school yet. Don't you think you should wait?"

"I am waiting. I told him I would wait until he got back and then we'd get married."

Charlie shook his head, "I still don't know Bells. Is this really what you want?"

"I couldn't be more positive. I love Edward more than anything else in this world why can't you trust me on that?"

Renee put a comforting hand on mine, "It's not that he doesn't trust you sweetheart. You're just a little young for this. Edward is your first boyfriend," she looked to the Cullen's, "And I mean no disrespect but are you sure you want him to be your last?"

"I can't imagine my life without him mom even if it means I have to wait for him."

Jacob stood up, "So that's it then," he said making his way to the front of the house.

"Jake," I said in a soft tone.

"Just let him go Bella," Billy said to me.

I looked at everyone in the room before following Jacob outside.

"Jake wait."

He stopped at then turned to me, "Damn it Bella, after everything he's put you through how could you accept his proposal? I would never have kept you waiting and I would never leave him."

"I love him Jake."

"I don't see why, he's no good for you."

"Like you're any better," I shot back knowing he was just as capable of hurting me in some form or another.

I could see his pulse beating stronger and I knew he was on the verge of transforming.

"I'm sorry," I said trying to calm him down. "I shouldn't have said that."

He huffed and then sighed. "No, you're right. I'm just as lethal as he is. Even though I hate that you still chose him over me maybe its best. I mean after all you are having his baby and then there's the matter that you bloodsuckers wreak."

"I could say the same about you wolf-man. We can still be friends right?"

Jake shook his head, "I don't think we have much of a choice. I've imprinted you remember."

"I'm sorry."

"I'm not. I'll see ya Bella."

"You don't want to come back inside?"

"No, it's cool. I just want to run for a while."

I nodded letting him go into the woods. When I was clear he was gone, I walked back into the house to spend what was left of the night with the people I loved.


	13. 6 Lisle Anthony Cullen

**6. Lisle Anthony Cullen**

(7 months later-July)

For Charlie's sake since I was still living under his roof I pretended to sleep though I never needed it. Sometimes Charlie would insist I rest since it was healthy for the baby. Every now and then Alice would bring me my favorite 'dark cherry soda'. Charlie still didn't understand why they needed to bring it when he could've whipped up some himself. To put his mind at ease I told them that they were family and that they wanted to help too. That seemed to be an answer he could live with. Clearly as seven months had passed, the gestation period seemed human enough and for that I was grateful since it meant no hiding out form anyone and telling them I had gotten a rare illness or something of that nature.

I woke up to a loud scream early in the morning only to realize it was my own. Charlie came rushing into my room, "Bells what's going on?"

He saw me hunched over near the window with my hand on my lower abdomen.

"Is the baby…" he said.

"Yeah," I replied. I screamed again.

"Okay we need to get you to Dr. Cullen," he said frantically. I couldn't help but smile at my dad. The last time he did this was eighteen years ago so he had every right to look nervous and freaked out.

As if on cue, Alice called my name from downstairs.

"Up here Alice," I said through small short breaths. She was by my side in less than a second as was Emmett.

"You don't look so good Bella, we need to get you to Carlisle," she said. "Emmett, help me get her downstairs."

Emmett looked at me, "Sorry sis, I know this was supposed to be Edward's job." I flinched at the sound of his name as Emmett picked me up and cradled me. Alice was talking to Charlie as they followed behind us but I could not make out any of the words they were saying.

We were at the Cullen's house in what seemed like minutes. I was ushered upstairs to one of Carlisle's personal infirmaries but something was not right, I felt different.

"We've got to get the seizing under control," I heard Carlisle say.

I was seizing, is that why I felt strange? Then I thought, the baby what if something happens to my son? I could sense my fears getting stronger and then suddenly slow down as quickly as they had come. Jasper: Jasper must have been in the room. I felt a cool sensation caressing my face.

"Hang in their Bella," the sweet angelic voice who I knew to be Esme's said to me, "You're gonna be fine, just hang in there."

I continued to slip in and out of consciousness. There were times it felt like the perfect dream: Edward, Lisle and I were together. Nothing in the world could go wrong with our perfect family. I stood by Edward, holding our son. Edward glimmered in the sunlight and he looked thrilled that we were both with him though we didn't glimmer; it was clear we belonged to each other.

There were other times when the dreams felt like nightmares. I was completely alone in the darkness. Edward was nowhere to be found. Sometimes I held our son in my arms, searching, waiting for Edward's return. Other times I had lost my son. No husband, no child. Alone. Destined to spend my life searching for the kind of love that could only be found in Edward Cullen.

"She's coming to," I heard Alice call out. Carlisle was immediately by my side.

"Bella," he asked, "Bella how are you feeling?"

I moved my head and tried to clear my blurred vision, "Edward, where's Edward?"

I could see Carlisle look to the others not knowing how to respond.

"He's not here," I said matter-of-fact.

"No," replied Carlisle, "I'm sorry."

It was too much to hope for wasn't it, wanting Edward to be here for the birth of his son. I understood Edward's commitment to the Masen family but this was an event you could never get back. It would have been nice to have had him here.

A smell came into the room which only meant one thing: Jacob Black had come n.

"What are you doing here Jake?"

"Your dad called me."

"Where is he?"

"Downstairs with Rosalie, Emmett, and the baby."

I immediately sat up, "Where is he, where is my baby?"

Carlisle placed a comforting hand on my shoulder, "Relax Bella, he's perfectly fine."

"What exactly happened?"

"You passed out. By the time you got here you started having seizures. The baby started pushing on its own so I had to induce despite the seizures. When the baby was out your seizures stopped; strange thing actually. I've never heard or seen anything like it."

Jake shook his head, "You always have to do things the hard way don't you Bella," he said laughing.

I ignored Jake's comment and turned to Carlisle, "But he's okay right?"

"He's perfectly fine. Would you like to see him?"

I nodded.

Within a few seconds everyone was in the room. Charlie came up behind the others. "I need to start working out so I can keep up with you all," he said to us.

We all smiled knowing no matter how hard Charlie tried he would never be as fast as the rest of us.

"My son," I said to Rosalie who was still holding him. She gently handed him over to me. I smiled down at the little infant who clearly had his fathers' eyes. "Hi there little guy. I'm your mom and this," I said looking at Jake, "is your uncle Jacob. He's gonna look after you while daddy's away. I wish he could see you right now. He'd be so proud." Jake placed his finger and let the baby grab it with his little hand. The infant jerked back clearly started by Jacob's warmth.

"Hey little Swan," he said to him.

"Cullen," I corrected, "It's Cullen. Lisle Anthony Cullen."

"I like it," said Carlisle.

"Me too," replied Esme, "Edward would be proud knowing he has his fathers' name."

I looked down at Lisle Anthony. I could not think of my own right words to say to him so I took a page from Superman, "You will be different, sometimes you will feel like an outcast but you'll never be alone. You will make my strength your own. You will see my life through your eyes as your life will be seen through mine."

I could sense Charlie staring at me, curious as to why I had chosen those particular words. I ignored his gaze and continued looking at my beautiful son. "We love you, your grandparents, your aunts and uncles, your father and me. We'll protect you and we'll always be here for you no matter what."


	14. 7 Epilogue: Reunion

**Epilogue: Reunion**

Two years had passed since the birth of Lisle Anthony. Two years with my son but two years without Edward. Though time no longer mattered to me, it did to Lisle and Charlie. Lisle was still growing. Carlisle concluded that he would stop when he reached eighteen since that was the age my own heart had stopped beating. Only time would tell if that conclusion was true but we had plenty of it. Charlie in the meantime continued to celebrate my birthdays since he still did not know of my vampire nature. To him I was now twenty years old. He always told me I never looked more beautiful, as if I never aged. If only he knew how true his statements were sometimes.

Today I spent my day with Lisle like I always did but today was special. Alice had seen in a vision that Edward would be coming home. She just didn't know when exactly. Even though Lisle was still young to understand some adult situations, I took him to the old house which never had been sold. Alice told me Charlie was holding onto it as a wedding present. I brought Lisle to the room, my room, where he had been conceived. The memory seemed as if had happened yesterday. Edward had been so nervous that night and it was more than just first time jitters. He was nervous that I would get hurt because I was still human at the time.

After we were done at the house, Lisle and I took a walk in the woods. For a two year old, he was all ready walking and didn't get tired of it. It was certainly the vampire part of him. He did not have a heartbeat though he looked human, his speed was evident and he was cold to the touch. I took Lisle to some of the places where I had been with Edward: the tree tops where he let me see him in the sunlight, the woods where I found out he was a vampire, and our meadow. Lisle seemed to sense the significance of these places as he would touch each natural thing gently as if they were made of glass and would soon break.

We were back at Charlie's house by mid day. I placed Lisle down for his nap but he didn't sleep long since he was too wired for the arrival of his father. There wasn't much to do. Laundry had been washed as had the dishes; again part of the charade I lived while under Charlie's roof. After getting restless, I picked up Lisle and we took a walk through the woods again, arriving at an abandoned house that we had come across a year ago. Alice had reassured us that this would be the place Edward would come though we still couldn't understand why. The sun was out in full force. I looked at Lisle and then looked to the sky circling slowly as I did so.

When I looked back at Lisle, he was smiling. "Day, day, day," he shouted- his word for daddy.

I looked to the small clearing in the woods and there was the silhouette I knew all too well. An ecstatic grin swept across my face as he continued to walk towards us. He was finally within several inches of me. He cupped my face and kissed my lips tenderly; a feeling I deeply missed but never forgot.

"Welcome home," I said to him after the kissing stopped.

He smiled at me and looked to Lisle, "Is this our son?"

I nodded, "Lisle Anthony Cullen, say hello to daddy."

Lisle reached for Edward immediately. "Day, day, day," he said excitedly.

"Hi there Lisle Anthony," Edward said feeling so proud.

"Stay, stay, stay," he said to his father.

"Promise," Edward said to his son meaning it. He then looked at me, "Now and forever."

Edward was right. We did have forever. It would be a never ending life but it would be worth it. We would be together as a family and nothing would ever break us apart. We belonged to each other and the world knew it. This was my dream that had come true and I was more than satisfied. I had my son and I had my Edward. Nothing could be better and nothing ever would be. This was my life now and I would treat it tenderly. I would love my boys the way I had always loved Edward and the way he had always loved me. It was now and forever.


End file.
